Oh, here is a picture of cobwebs
August 2nd of 2010 is what our last post said about the date. That's a long time. A long, long time. A long time that is long. Wow. That is exactly two years next month. Maybe I should wait until then so the break went beautiful.
Hell no.
I get my body rounder and rounder. What's the proper term for that.. chubbier? I plan(ned) to do some exercises to burn fat. I made plan and failed miserably. I always say 'next morning' but nothing is really done. My best streak is two days. I want to be healthy. I don't need big muscles, I just want health. I want to be healthy when I get old(er).
This is not why I write this post. No. I need to write. I need to write things to express. You know, I have another blog and I write rhymes there. I feel so much excited about the idea at first, but I just easily got bored. I realize that rhyming (making rhymes) can't express myself as full as writing shits like what you read in this blog. I stuck with the rules. I stuck and felt like fools. When I can't continue, I just stop, because I know I will have different feelings in another start. For me, feeling is the most important thing for you to have to do arts.
Also there is the so-called 'galau'(-ness) that bothered me recently. It's simply the word in Bahasa Indonesia originally for the feeling of uncertainty (but is overused by idiots so much that the meaning changes). I'm feeling uncertain about my future. I see so many successful people and just feel more and more demotivated. You know, successful people do things for their dream. I want to be like them, but what have I done? I just slack everyday. I don't do things. I just want the success. That's just wrong.
And funnily enough, I wrote rhyme for this. Maybe that is done in my another galau-ness.
I aim to be rich. To be rich, a way very possible is to become an entrepreneur. I'm not an entrepreneur. No, not yet. This 'not-yet' thing itself is uncertain. I haven't yet starting. I do not start. I'm just too scared. I'm too scared of failure. No, maybe not that. I'm scared of starting. Oh maybe yes, I just scared of failure. I'm afraid things don't do as I thought, and most successful entrepreneur fails in their first years. Some others keep failing years later. I knew this, but I don't know, maybe I'm just lazy.
Maybe I'm just too lazy in starting things. In making rhymes, in doing exercise, in becoming an entrepreneur, in taking actions. I want to have the eagerness, the romanticism of having a dream. I don't want to be forever a dreamer, I want to achieve. Much more like this recent Coca-Cola TV commercial:
I will aim.
End of flight.